There is something beautiful and scary stirring within me that I've been ignoring. Well, I suppose I haven't been ignoring it--instead I've been feeding the other parts of my being, leaving my whole self just satiated enough so that this which lies just beneath the contentedness does not rebel and burst forth. But it's a powerful force, a force that has gained nourishment even when I neglect to actively feed it.
There are parts of me that easily die-off if I do not feed them. Vitriol, annoyance, judgment: these things all easy fade if I elect to not seep myself in them. And I have been building a powerful force of professional organizing and development in my life--I do like these parts of myself. However, there is a gorgeous wild chaos that lives at the tip of my tongue and is balancing on the diving board of my heart. There is a storm that brews just behind my lungs and is waiting to leap out.
I love this life I live, and this path is wonderful. I have no need to backtrack to or decommission any roads I've been on. What I need to do next is really make sure that there are not roads that pieces of my soul inhabit that have fallen out of focus on my map. I need to make sure the path I continue along is wide enough to include all the parts of me I want to integrate.
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